Yesterday was the last episode of the search for the untimate gender and we have a winner !!
It's a girl !!!
I was seriously surprised cause I really lately thought it's a boy. There were all the signs and the fact we have 8 nephews and no niece, indicated that only boys run in the family. Then the tech last week said she though ti's a boy. So that's what I was expecting. I also had most signs of the boy pregnancy, I carry very high, you can't tell from the behind that I'm pregnant etc. There are more signs but I can't remember right now.
We're both very happy, even my husband who wouldn't hear of a girl before, now it's the only thing he can think about, he's going to be a daddy of a little girl !!
Today was not the day of the week. Ever since Monday I have been feeling pains. I was so worried I paged my midwife (of course the issue with the homestudy didn't really help) Turns out it is probably ligament pains. I had a hot water bottle on my tummy the whole evening but didn't seem to do nothing.
Today, February 18th, was my 20 weeks ultrasount with gender. When I called for the appointment, the first location told me: we don't do the gender here, you have to go to Simon avenue. So I called Simon avenue location and booked the appointment. That place is about 40 kms away.
We got so excited. I did have to have a full bladder (turned out it was too full and I only drank 1/2 of the required amount!) We got to the clinic and the first thing they told me is that they don't do gender here, they only do it in Langley (which is where we live, actually) I was so upset tears just starting falling from my eyes (I didnt cry, they were just falling!!!) I was so excited to finally find out (all my online friends know, and I dont) And no, they wouldn't really tell us. She wouldn't even tell me what she's doing, and when I asked she shut me down with the request to be quiet so she can do her job. And they wouldn't let my husband in neither. So much for universal free healthcare in Canada. I guess i was the first pregnant woman they have seen ever, since they obviously have never seen the anxiety of an expectant mother slash hormones.
I was so upset I got a huge headache and an idea. There is a place (in Langley again) where they do the 3-d. I never wanted to get that, since they all look the same (they seriously do) but this is an only chance to find out before baby is born since I wasted my only u/s left for the wrong information (i just screw things up, unfortunately. I wish someone else takes care of me and these things cause I really cant handle stuff like this and just screw up everything) Anyway, I called that place, and they didn't have time. Then I got this idea to ask about today and indeed they did have 3 pm, which was the only time I could make (my school starts at 4) So I got there, and we spent next 1/2 poking the baby, making all kind of funny movements and asking the baby to kick mommy so we can peek. No luck. My baby is too comfy lying horizontally with his little leggies bent. She said she thought she saw something, and didn't want to say but I begged and begged and she thought she saw a boy. But since that's just what she thought, I can't take it as official and have to go back on Friday for a second chance. I didn't tell my husband this time, I wanted to surprise him. How great would that be that I come from school at night, him knowing nothing and say: It's a boy ! It's a girl !! He would be shocked cuase he knew how upset I am and how I suddenly know !!!! I am really good in pulling these surprises (ecxept babiecheck didn't cooperate)
And other good news: I did find the parking at school even when I was late and the test was quite ok, I did leave first as usual, but I feel good about answers since I seem to have memorized the right stuff this time. We shall see!!
We went to the agency today to drop things off, so they can start the translations for China. I talked about the HS, and again I reminded them I am not disputing the fees (it is indeed written in that agreement, which we knew) What I don't like, is that we were assigned sw from so far, who didn't even have an office and still are being charged. I mean, if we were told to go to her office, but declined, then by all means, charge us. But since she didn't have that option, we shouldn't be forced the fees on. It is not our fault after all she lives so far and doesn't have an office. The other thing they told us is that they assigned her to us cause she used to live in our area. Another => insert eyes rolling here <= (as in, did it change anything?) She keeps calling me, but only when I'm at work so I can't pick up my phone anyway. I was told she feels very upset and wants to talk about it. She would tell me that she told us, we would tell her she didn't, and we wouldn't get anywhere (unless I'd admit that she did and we made this up, I guess?) So what would be the point of such a phone call.
She also heard that I asked for a different sw for our subsequent hs. We would like someone who lives closer and has an office. Is that too much to ask? I don't know what's wrong. Either I don't stood up to things, or I do and I just cause trouble. I don't have the right to say things or what. Everyone now seems upset and I'm in the middle supposed to confront people and work things out. I do hate arguing, and that is the only thing we would do.
The homestudy turned absolutely great, I was really surprised we are seen as such nice people, but these little things just keep bitter taste for everyone included. And the solution could have been so simple: give us an option to go to the sw's office, or don't charge families if you don't have any to give us such an option !!
People like us are adopting a baby who has no mommy, daddy or a home and still, it's so hard to help someone these days.
We did pay the fees after all, and hope to put this behind, but we hope this will not happen again to us or anyone else.
We got a really great homestudy report, it makes me feel so good !! I was surprised how well it turned. I was also surprised we were charged additional fees. We were assigned a sw from quite far (from a small village while we live close to the city) and she charged us a mileage. She charged us the same amount even though she went to visit another family before us. I was not happy but what can we do. All others go to their offices, but we of course had to have one who always came to our home only. Even this I was asking about and I was assured it's fine. Now we have to pay another $250. I know the economy is tough but to take advantage of people who are adopting a baby who has no mommy or daddy or a home, I don't know. I'm not really now disputing the mileage and that there is extra fee on top of the homestudy, just the fact that we were assigned the sw from so far. She is charging us more then a taxi would take from her to our place. So if you are assigned a sw for your homestudy, make sure that you ask if she charges anything extra !! Ours was also late few times and cancelled on us frequently, which with our busy schedule was sometimes quite complicated (we both work full times different days and I also go to the University). So we will be requesting a different sw for our post placement study, just to make things easier.
I also started making new mittens for my store. I am changing my whole line. These ones are longer and snugglier and most of my items are actually on Spring/Summer sale already ! Please take an advantage of the discounts !!!
Dear Baby, Happy Valentine !! You are now 20 weeks old as of today. You are growing in mommy's tummy and you make it feel really funny. 20 more weeks or less and you will be here so mommy can start dressing you into all those cute little clothes that are already cluttering the whole house. You better not grow too fast !! And no, still no Boston infant clothing for you :( But don't worry mommy will for sure buy some before you are here. Love, mommy ...