18 days left

Today, we had the hospital tour. It was so exciting !! We originally wanted to go to the Langley hospital but we decided to go to Surrey Memorial (they have OB 24/7 while the Langley one has him on call so sometimes he's not available right away) They also have private rooms where all the action is happening, which is great so you dont have to be moved from room to room to room... When I saw all the equipment they have for the babies, I was almost in tears, it was so touching and looked so real. The rooms there are great (better then those we've seen in Langley) The only thing is that the L. is closer to us, but I know now I'd have to switch anyway due to the need of Dr because of my diabetes, I wouldn't be able to go to Langley anymore (as I will need to have Dr at any possible time to evaluate me whenever necessary)

The only thing was that there was a couple with three kids already (why do you need the tour, even if you went to a different hospital, they all look similar!) Anyway the youngest child was bored and constantly crying. They spent majority of time distracting him, tickling him and making him laugh, so he won't cry and I found that quite disturbing, as I couldn't hear half of the stuff the nurses were saying, and I couldn't concentrate. The couple didn't really care about other people and that they can't hear neither, and kept doing their own thing.

We have also decided we don't want any visitors in the hospital at all. I am a very private and secretive person and I can't imagine just being distracted by visits. I don't know how things will go, how much pain there will be and we just want to be alone, private and cozy and just go through this experience without any outside influence. My husband will be calling his parents, we will then try to reach my parents in Prague and as soon as these 4 people are informed, we will start informing everyone else ! I think I mentioned it earlier, but it would break my heart if someone else except my husband's parents would find out before we are able to inform my own parents !!! I just can't imagine. I dont' know why it matters to me so much, but it does and it just has to be that way. It will probably be just a day or so, but it's so very important to us.

I have 18 days left (maximum, I hope!!) and I cannot believe it. It really went so fast. So fast !!! I wanted to have a baby today, 6-16 is such a cute birth date, but it's about 10.42 pm and unless the miracle happens, this baby is not coming tonight. So next cute date is ... hmm... i dont know ! I guess we will now be shooting for Fridays since B has three days off (and that would work great cuase he wouldn't have to take any days off that way)

The baby can now come any day and I still have absolutely no traces of fear, panic or anxiety. In fact, I am really looking forward the labour, pains, my baby and sleepless nights.

And we have already chosen a name but will not be sharing until she is born. It will be a surprise !!

So baby, if you can hear me or read my mind, which I know you can, please take in consideration, that your mommy would like to meet you really, really soon. Like ... now !!